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I’ve been wanting to say some things while feeling the need to avoid doing so, but I’ve been practicing not avoiding things I want lately so here it is.

It was emotional coming back to Australia. I smoked a little joint the first time in 7 weeks and took some time to think about what emotions are really being amplified for me right now.

Even though I feel a pull to slow down and get my bearings, I’m still, in my typical fashion, unable to enjoy slowing down to stop. I will deal with unpacking and finalising my EOFY taxes and then I’m officially taking bookings from Wednesday.

I feel a bit strange putting ’birthday month’ in my bio since my birthday is right at the first burst of the month, and also ‘over’. I feel lucky to have spent it somewhere new, doing beautiful things, with someone I love, but a part of me can’t help feeling I am still separated.

I really wanted to say that spending the last almost 11 weeks on hiatus has been restorative for me and a beautiful experience, and that I missed my cat and my work and I missed the rush of my life. Though that rings so true to me that it’s a tune, a part of it carries something bittersweet. I can’t lie, I feel a little shame for my desire to autopilot back into life before I really tried to start building some balance in my routine (whatever a routine is, I just cant seem to get it).

It’s strange to dance this limbo where I crave to go back to how things were before my surgery or my trip, but I can’t help that feel that I am still carrying a sadness – one I have known for a long time but have only truly allowed myself to feel in full force over the last year – and I can’t lie, a part of me does feel some shame for that sadness.

I used to be a very expressive person, but I feel as though I have been closed up, like a skeleton that someone has slowly over time draped in paper mache, to build me into something strong and solid and unbreakable. Sometimes I don’t know if I’m doing too much or too little of what I want. I have realised that I don’t trust myself much anymore, not in the ways I used to, and that I want to carve a routine that I feel passion and motivation for that I’m not sure even exists. I avoid things that I used to enjoy, and give them arbitrary labels like ‘good’ and ‘bad’, and I try to make myself balanced, which only leaves me more controlled. I sacrifice a lot, to become the person I feel I should be. Something that has served a great purpose in both giving me what I needed, while helping me either to remember or forget.

I have been thinking a lot of my younger self. I used to read all the time. You’d never find my head outside of a book. I loved writing. I loved song. I dreamt of ‘naïve’ worlds where I would be a ballerina, a poet, a novelist, or a singer. I loved to sing. All of the time. As someone who lived my life inside my head, music and words became a language that I breathed myself into that made me feel love in my life.

I feel that I’ve grown cold to myself and my imagination. I’ve grown cold to my expression. The transparent and trusting person, that is still there underneath, grew harder. I guess I ended up on this path because I couldn’t bring myself to do all the things I feel shame for not doing in my life, that I can’t seem to find the desire or practice for.

Work became something I started to adjust my life to, rather than something I did to sustain my life. It was and is a beautiful and strange and complex thing I have so much love and time for. It was learning and affection and attachments. With some, it was a way to spend time with people who really had time for me.

Since my surgery is over, I’ve had time to recover, and I’m home from my time overseas, I guess I’m ‘officially’ back to work. But I want to move forward having time for the largeness I feel. I would say I’ve been ignoring how I feel to the point of sinking myself, but ignored is the wrong word. I feel. I feel silently, strongly, and vastly. I don’t know what the word for that is.

Ive been struggling to decide how I want to proceed forward with rates and working in a way that compliments me, so for now, I’ll be offering set rates for bedroom dates of 1.5 hours or less, and offering bespoke rates for anything more, to encourage those who want to spend some time doing something social and meaningful (either alongside a bedroom date, or standing alone). This might change or might not, and I will fiddle as I desire. The point is in the practice of trying things I’m not sure about on for size.

Here’s how we are moving forward for now. Website and ads will be adjusted accordingly soon.

~ A swift taste | 30 minutes

Erotic Massage 300 AUD

Girlfriend Experience 450 AUD

Naughty Girlfriend Experience 550 AUD

~ A little more | 1 hour

Erotic Massage 400 AUD

Girlfriend Experience 650 AUD

Naughty Girlfriend Experience 750 AUD

~ Sweet spot | 1.5 hours

Erotic Massage 600 AUD

Girlfriend Experience 900 AUD

Naughty Girlfriend Experience 1,000 AUD

Please enquire politely about your ideal date for a bespoke rate for anything longer than 1.5 hours and dates including social activity. Bespoke rates will be all inclusive of any travel or accom fees necessary to make your request happen. Get in touch for package inclusions, bespoke packages and requests of extras. You may choose or opt to pay my full hourly rate x your desired length for multi hour dates, if you wish.

I’m sure I’ll be mistaken and dissected by some, and I’m okay with that. Connection truly is the crux of what I want, and to be there, I need to shed some truth. I’m looking forward to celebrating my birthday and return with you.

All my love,

Hunter x

If you know me, you’d know that music drives me and I rarely go without a playlist to complement the environment I am in. I believe that it is one of the universal languages of connection we have, and that curating a great soundtrack can only do wonders in bringing people together. In saying that, here are some of my favourite tunes to move my body to, in and out of the bedroom…

Minnie Riperton, Rotary Connection, 1971, I am The Black Gold of The Sun

Soul meets universe with this psychedelic jazz-soul number. Flowing into territories of funk and rock, this is a song that will pick you up with it as it struts through its own lifetime. From the first minute you’re taken over by shredding guitars and a rhythm that feels like flying. This will always be one of the most joyous celebrations of life I have ever felt.

Erykah Badu, 2003, I Want You

My most cherished memory of this song was during an extended booking with a client at his apartment. We smoked a little weed together and spent hours talking just because the feeling that we knew each other was so evident. As he asked me to dance with him, this song came on; The heartbeat of every kick creating a soothing tempo to move, hips to hips, flowing through a moment of bittersweet romance, wishing it lasted longer than the moment we were given. A song to long to and a song to break through yourself with.

Mazzy Star, 1993, Wasted

My oh my, this blues rock track always puts me in a mood. The drums swagger alongside a crunchy guitar riff, with tender, moaning vocals that pull you into a dreamy daze. If you’re looking for a song to chew you up and spit you out in the heat of the moment, this is the one for you. Best played during hot, sweaty sex or during the building anticipation of first touch.

The Chakachas, 1971, Jungle Fever

Anyone who has seen Boogie Nights knows that this is a very cheeky track. Listen to the first 30 seconds and you will find you are already far along a ride you didn’t know you got on. Every interlude drawing you further into tantalization, you’ll find your breath coinciding with the rise and the fall of the tension this song holds.

Betty Davis, 1973, If I’m In Luck I Might Get Picked Up

Davis as always is able to encapsulate a state of playfulness and sensuality, while expressive and boisterous. This one gives me the image of kicking glasses of the bar tabletop, parading around for anyone watching. The thrill of the chase, the desire to give yourself up. Be prepared to throw yourself in a slow cooker of unconstrained teasing and ferocious lust.

Creedence Clearwater Revival, 1968, I Put A Spell On You

Creedence Clearwater Revival really do themselves justice with one of my favourite covers of all time. This track would almost be playful if it wasn’t so animalistic. If you weren’t rolling around the sheets in a wild frenzy before this one, you will be now. There is a tinge of encapsulation and ownership with this one that always makes me feel helpless in another’s arms. The perfect mixture of menace and submission, this song plays a demon in the bedroom.

Lamb, 1996, Lusty

A song about longing with just enough kick to lift you up. I recommend listening to this one as you walk around in the sun or feel the rain on your skin. Observe what is around you, observe the feelings that arise, and observe who comes into your mind. This one always makes me want to let go of nostalgia and run into the arms of something passionate and loving.

I’m back from hiatus..

Songs to Dance, Fuck and Move To